Have you heard of the broken window theory? The term “Broken Windows” was proposed by James Q. Wilson and George Kelling in 1982 that used broken windows as a metaphor to describe this concept: “If a window is broken and left unrepaired, people walking by will conclude that no one cares and no one is in charge.” This theory says that the little things matter.
Prior to the development and implementation of various incivility theories such as broken windows, law enforcement scholars and police tended to focus on serious crime; that is, the major concern was with crimes that were perceived to be the most serious and consequential for the victim, such as rape,robbery, and murder. Wilson and Kelling took a different view. They saw serious crime as the final result of a lengthier chain of events, theorizing that crime emanated from disorder and that if disorder were eliminated, then serious crimes would not occur. ~britannica.com
Basically, the theory is: if there is a building with a broken window, it will “invite” vandalism, which will escalate to more serious crimes.
The same is true in our home: If there is a pile of miscellaneous clutter on the counter, it will “invite” us to leave more things on the pile.
When you have something in your hand – say, a piece of mail – it’s very easy to put that item on top of a pile of clutter. You might think, “It’s already such a mess, one more piece won’t make much of a difference.” On the other hand, you’re less likely to put that item onto a clean surface. In that case, you might think, “I’ve worked so hard to make this area neat; I don’t want to mess it up now.” ~Buried in Treasures: Help for Compulsive Acquiring, Saving, and Hoarding
And then, the clutter piles multiply, until one day, we look around and the amount that has accumulated is overwhelming and affects our stress levels and our mental and emotional wellbeing.
Allowing the dishes to sit for days or papers and miscellaneous to accumulate on flat surfaces, gives the impression that it’s acceptable.
When we routinely don’t pick up after ourselves, we create what’s called a norm which, in essence, gives social permission for everyone else in our home to do the same. ~unclutter.com
Typical household “broken windows”:
- Dishes in the sink
- Unsorted mail
- Overflowing trash
- Leftover food prep on kitchen counters
- Laundry piles
- Loose change around the house
People follow; if you want your home to be tidy, set the example. Make it important to you.
- Declutter your own items.
- Develop routines.
- Include children in chores and putting things away after they are used.
Taking care of the little things, helps you accomplish the big things in your life:
People get a real lift when they put things in their place, tackle nagging tasks, clear surfaces, and get rid of things that don’t work or aren’t used. This surge of energy makes it easier to ask more of ourselves, to use our self-control, and to stick to a challenging habit. Also, accomplishing small tasks boosts our sense of “self-efficacy.” The more we trust ourselves to follow through on our own commitments, the more likely we are to believe that we can keep an important habit. ~Better Than Before: Mastering the Habits of Our Everyday Lives
Dealing with all the “broken windows” means there won’t be that nagging thought: “I need to get that done” in the back of your mind all the time. It allows you to be present in the moment.
I know, as a mom, I’ve often heard the expression “Housework will always be there- spend time with your children.” Yes, housework will always been there, but knowing the challenges I’ve had to go through in my own life, dealing with clutter and depression, the biggest gift I can give to my children is teaching them how to keep a tidy home.
That doesn’t mean that I slave all day keeping the house immaculate or follow them around picking up after them.
Part of living minimally means I have less stuff that needs to be cleaned/sorted/organized/put away. It simplifies the task of keeping house. It also means that is easier for me to include the children in daily routines.
The housework will always be there,but if we let it sit, it becomes an unbearable burden.
The housework will always be there for our children as well, let’s teach them how to take care of it, so they won’t have to struggle with it.
What are your “broken windows”?
A note to new moms and those with chronic health issues: If you need to rest, please do! Seek outside help: when people ask if there is anything they can do, take them up on it. Have them do the dishes or fold laundry. Hire help to take care of the little things. Get rid of everything except the essentials. With chronic pain and fatigue, it’s difficult to wash a full sink of dishes, but it’s do-able to wash one plate and one fork. When you have limited your possessions, it takes less work to maintain a tidy home.